Mag Busters: Cosmo – Vol. 245, No. 4, (AKA October 2008 Issue); Page: 158
Cosmo mentions 15 things you can do to spice things up in your long-term relationship. The loss of luster happens to every couple in some way…not always sex. Sex is not always the definite barometer for the relationship despite what Sam would have you believe.
Here is a list 3 activities Cosmo recommends that wouldn’t make me happy:
1) Hang With a Different Crew…they mention, “inviting a few acquaintances out for a few appetizers…ask lots of questions about their lives and share details of yours, so you feel like you get to know them better.” J’s take…a double date where me and other guy sit there quietly while you two gab. If this works, you’re not dating a man; you’re dating a garden tool.
2) Dangerous Question: “If we hadn’t met, what do you think your life would be like right now?” J’s take…sure, I’ll ask that and then right after we will discuss all the people we’ve had sex with. This is a disaster question and makes men (and women) uncomfortable.
3) Cosmo’s List of Conversation Starters. J’s take…you shouldn’t need a list of weird questions that force you into awkward conversations. You know why you two are attracted to each other…talk about the things that you’re interested in. If that’s not working anymore, then the relationship isn’t either.
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I missed the memo where spicing up your sex life doesn’t improve everything else.
Magazines are stupid. Busting them is a good plan. Good on ya.
And conversation starters? You’re exactly right. If it was a first date, sure, but if you need a cheat-sheet to have a CONVERSATION with your lover, then there’s no hope. Get out while you can.
As a woman, these magazines just insult me. I mean, first of all it makes us look desperate and creepy. To whip out a sheet of questions, and proceed to interview my boyfriend (who I’ve been with “long term”) would really just look crazy!
Secondly, there’s so many more important things that could be talked about, such as politics, art, film, literature, rather than fantasizing about how crappy each of our lives would be had we not met each other. ICK! Nothing gets me hotter than a good political debate! Brains can be sexy!